Truth: Chapter 19
“Tom. Dude, are you seriously going to go solo to a wedding?” Greg asked me, while I was tying my tie. Christina picked it out for me. It was deep crimson, “Tom, it will make your eyes pop out! Get it now, so we can get coffee! Well, do it!”
I shook back the memory, and responded “Yes, and what?”
“Shouldn’t you be going with Watson?”
“She’s going with Char….that asshole” I muttered.
“Dude, you’re in love.” He laughed. “That’s classic!”
I punched him on the arm.
00000
“Colin, relax! You’re freaking me out!” I told him, holding back a scream.
He was pacing back and forward rapidly, and pulling his hair- muttering something like “What if he leaves me at the aisle? Like that Julia Roberts movie- shit, I can’t remember the movie. I’m gay! I should know these classic romantic comedies…”
I walked over to him, and slapped him hard across the face.
“Control yourself. Tony is not going to leave you. Jeesh, you are stressing me out. Come on! We have 3 hours until the wedding, let’s grab coffee.” I soothed (besides I wanted coffee)
“Oh, Christina! I have to get ready!”
“Colin, you are not getting fitted into a dress or putting on makeup- you are just going to shower and put on your suit-“I stopped, and remembered Colin’s ridiculous bathing ritual. “It’ll take an hour.”
He looked thoughtful, then “Invite Char and Tom- I can’t see the man-bride before the wedding.”
I laughed, but started to text the two men.
0000
“Black and white Frappe, blended, nay on the whip cream, Turtle Truffle Frappe, Columbia, hot, and Brazilian, iced. “ The waitress handed us our Beverage of the Gods.
“So, Tom. Still whoring yourself out?” Char asked casually.
Colin laughed. That boy always liked awkwardness.
“Char, still longing for a girl who will never love you back?”
“Fuck you.” Char rose from the table. “I’m sick of your condescending comments, and looks. You think you are better than me? I’m studying to be a lawyer, I’m handsome, fuck you. If Christina loved you, she would have made up with you 3 months ago! You are nothing but a fickle asshole. “
Tom sipped his coffee, and stood up. There was a 2 inch height different “Listen, you insecure bastard. I know I’m better than you. I’m studying to be a doctor- helping people, rather than ripping than off. I love Christina, more than you’ll ever know- more than you are capable. Shut your goddamn mouth, before I do it for you.”
They stared at each other for a moment, then knocked over the table and started fighting.
“AH. I SPILLED MY COFFEE! AND STOP FIGHTING! STOP IT, NOW! YOU GUYS ARE A BUNCH OF IMBECILES! “I screamed.
They looked at me.
“Char,” I looked at the brown-haired, freckled lover- the guy who made me laugh for months “You don’t love me. You love the idea of me. Never once, have you said it. Never once, have we had deep conversations. You are constantly looking at other girls. Tell me, I’m wrong. “
He looked down, ashamed. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”
He turned to leave, “Still best friends forever-ever? “
“Are you sure you’re not queer?” Colin chipped in.
“No, Will and Grace, and you are getting married! Shame on you!”
We shared a laughed, and some of the tension was eased.
0000
“Char, pick up your freckled asshole! Char, I swear- if I go alone to that wedding, I’m going to throw a pot of scalding hot coffee on you…”
“Christina?” Char picked up on the fourth ring.
“Oh, hello. I was calling to see, why you are 5 minutes late to pick me up…”
“Did you just threaten to spill hot coffee on me?”
“That’s not the point.” I started. “Pick me up! I’m already dressed.”
There was a knock on my door.
I opened it, anxious. That better be Char.
“Char! It’s about- sorry, I had a pot of coffee. “I paused. “Do I have coffee breath?”
He leaned close. “A little. Grab an altoid.”
I looked at him, closely. This was Char. Char, I made out with. Char, I laughed with…Char had a zit.
“Char, you have a giant zit on your chin. Let me put concealer on it.” He shook his head. “You are going to take pictures, with that monster on your face?”
He sighed.
“Great! You gave in. Let me grab my make up bag. “
0000
“Colin, do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband in the state of Maine?”
“I do.”
There were cheers from the crowd.
After the ceremony, I ran up to Colin and hugged him. “Colin! Congrats! You are a married man! I love you so much- Tony,” I started, when he walked up to us. “Take care of my best friend. Use your manly man muscles for some good, kay?”
Tony nodded.
This is it, I thought, we are all growing up. No more, 10 pm dashes to the movie store, because we are stressed from finals. No more sleeping until noon on a Tuesday, becausee class doesn’t start until 2. No more, what? I can’t say that we are going to grow up and become the Adults our parents were-just yet anyway. We are in our early 20s; yet, still, Colin and Tony’s marriage brought me to this conclusion: Everybody’s evolving from the ever-changing world.
000
“Char, are you sure about this?” I asked him quietly. “Boston College is so…in Boston.”
“It’s a 70 percent scholarship, Chris.” He looked at me for a moment, and then grabbed my hand. “It’s only 4 and a half hours, and think of all the adventures you can have driving there. The neighborhood coffee shops, singing to college radios….we’re graduating in 2 weeks. I already made my decision. I love you, but this is for me. “
I gave him a sad smile. “I have this theory, that when you are a teenager- you honestly believe the world is about you. When you are in your 20s, it is blatantly clear, it is not- yet, and you still want it to be so. But, to me, it’s always been-the world is about decisions of other people- that may or may not include you. Like on a Sunday, if you want brunch-and they don’t invite you. Or…you know. “
He laughed, already used to my rambling after a year, and squeezed my hand.
“Here’s looking at you, kid.” He raised his glass.
“Are you going to get me drunk again, so I can sleep with you? How cliché.”
He rolled his eyes, but clicked my glass.
“Here’s to us.”
000
“Honey, I’m drunk.” Ms. Patty told me, handing me a glass.
“That I can see.” I laughed, but grabbed the champagne nonetheless.
“Char is leaving for Boston,” Grandma Watson came up to us “I think he’s gay.”
“What if he’s just a self-actualized man?”
The two old women looked at each other.
“Tom, Christina isn’t behind you.” Mrs. Watson told me.”He’s-“
“Behind you?” Char appeared, just as I knew he would. Nah. I saw him walking this way, when Mrs. Watson came over.
“Queer boy! Doesn’t this Gay Wedding inspire you?” Ms. Patty asked him, clapping him roughly on the shoulder.
He laughed. “Just because a man is well-dressed, knows good movies, likes dark chocolate- the candy, Control yourself! I am not gay.”
At this, there was a tense silence.
“Okay, I came here to confess my undying love to Tom. Christina was all a ridiculous ploy to get this yummy flesh of man. “Char paused, when the two old women gave knowing looks, “Are you serious?!”
“Forget it. They are already gone. “After I said this, I looked at the two women slapping the table, and laughing uproariously at some joke.
He motioned me away from the two drunken biddies.
“Undying love?” I scoffed.
“Shut up. It was some ace sarcasm.”
I rolled my eyes. “Gilmore Girls?” He nodded, pathetically. “Seasons 5-6 all weekend, 3 weeks ago.”
I laughed “Been there. But, we just got to season 3.”
And then, a shared looked between two men whipped, without being together with the actual girl took place.
“Thanks for taking care of her, when I was gone.”
“Gone-by choice.” Char laughed, then “You’re welcome. If she wasn’t adorable as a basket case…”
“Yeah.” We said together.
“It takes a lot to handle her. You were doing it for a year and a half, before me….good luck again.” Char extended his arm.
“Are you asking for my hand in marriage? I thought you weren’t gay?” I joked. “Thank you. Keep in touch. “I said seriously.
“Bon Voyage. “ Char waved
“Bye, ass.” I waved back.
Instead of getting into a fight, we both laughed- So, this is how adults handled the cowboy showdown.
Oh, god. That’s not a Brokeback reference.
000
Graduation. I’m graduating. Chilton University kiss my short ass goodbye!
I took a deep breath.
This is it. Once I get my diploma, I am officially an adult. Suddenly, I started worrying about if I’ll find a job after graduation. I changed my major at the end of my sophomore year to Education. I thought of Tom and Colin going to NYU for their medical degrees. They don’t seem scared at all. Why do I?
Hands shaking, I rummaged in my cabinet for my lorezapam; an anti-anxiety medicine. My panic attacks have gotten better, but there is still the random episode.
My cell started ringing; the ringtone is The Kooks ‘She moves in her own way’
“Tom? Yeah, I’ll be right there. “
Huh. He sounded excited. I guess I’ll find out, when I get there.
000
He was wearing light blue. I always liked him in light blue. It brought out the gray in his eyes. Eyes, sadness, happiness- I love how I can tell how he’s feeling through his eyes.
“Christina.” He had coffee ready for me.
“Tom, how are you?”
It felt awkward for some reason.
“Good, let’s go for a walk. “ He grabbed my hand and we walked out of Coffee Blues.
I looked back; Miss. Patty was smiling at us.
000
“Truth.” He looked at me seriously.
“Shoot.” He was making me nervous with his stare. It wasn’t his usual roll-of-the-eyes affection, but something deeper. What was it?
“If I were to tell you, I want to wake up to your smile and cute screech for coffee in the morning, listen to you ramble when you are nervous, love you even when you doubt anyone can with your “neuroticness” - would you believe me?” He stared at me then, and it felt like the world wasn’t falling apart, for once.
“Yes.”
000
Graduation was over 30 minutes ago, and me, Tom, Colin and Tony were at ihop.
“What is it about the tutti fruiti waffles that is so godly? “ Colin asked us.
“I don’t know, but the coffee for a diner is pretty okay. “ Tom told us.
“That’s weird, “I told him.”I was just going to say that.”
He smiled and grabbed my hand.
“So, what’s next? “ Tony asked us. “You graduated; I have my master’s degree already. What’s going to happen next?”
We paused.
“We are going to keep in touch. “ I started. “And evolve to mature adults, all the while sharing laughs and looking forward to the distant future.”
“Does it have to be so dramatic?” Tom challenged.
“No, but I’m overdramatic and ridiculous. Get over it.”
Colin laughed. “She’s been like that since she was in high school.”
Tony shuddered. “Hiding in the closet, especially as a football player is terrible. “
“I came out when I was 17.” Colin informed us, “Right after I broke up with Christina.”
I scoffed “I broke up with you!”
“Sure, my dear. “
We all sipped our semi-godly coffee.
“Neurotic faces the world. Chapter one” I said.
“Gay men facing marriage, Chapter One.” Colin answered for Tony and himself.
“Boy in love. Chapter 3” Tom looked down.
“Awww, Cheesy!” I said, but grabbed his hand.
After we said out goodbyes, Tom and I walked to my apartment.
“Is your cat there? “
I blinked back imaginary tears. “I am allergic.”
He laughed.
That’s how it started:
Truth and laughter.
The End.
